Somewhat of a Quandary

As a recent blog post said, I've been feeling pretty content with retirement living and where I am. I am not quite through my 4th month of retirement and I have yet had any feelings of boredom. It just doesn't matter to me what I do or don't do during the day. I enjoy every day.

Even while enjoying one of the coolest Midwestern summers that I can remember ... I'm restless.

Can a person be content and restless at the same time?

Most of the days and nights you will see my house windows are open. No air conditioning is needed. The yard is always mowed, the weeds are winning the war on the gravel drive, the rains come at the right time and just enough to keep the yard green. This is the first time in a long time that I can remembering needing to mow my yard every week in the month of July here in the Southern Tropics of Indiana.

With me not being a big TV watcher, I have a lot of time to think, analyze and have information to look at during the evenings. That is where the "somewhat of a quandary" comes in.

After saying over and over that I cannot travel with 3 hounds that are bred with "wandering noses" ... I realize that no matter what I do, they will adapt. In fact will probably adapt faster than I will.

After going back and forth for the past 2 years I am finding no joy in doing the same thing every day over and over, month after month. Even year after year. I cannot see myself doing this in the future for the rest of my life.

I know the best vehicle for hounds and I to travel in, if I decide to travel is the Class A, 29' - 31' in length, towing my FJ, with my Mtn bike racked on the back. Yet I've always feared the repair costs of an older rig, in addition to being a Class A MH so to me that is not an option.

I know personally I could live in a 17' trailer comfortably, towed by my Toyota FJ if it were just me, but the hounds come into play. Still, at times I think this combo would work as long as I used a 10'x10' PaHa Que tent as a sleeping room for the hounds during the day and a shade room for me during the days of good weather.

I like the house I live in, I don't mind the area and everything I need medically is nearby ... I'm also close to the campus town I love. Yet, like I stated a few weeks ago ... it's a great place but there is just a gut feeling that it's time to go and find new places.

As far as the house, it's low maintenance and according to my expenditure spreadsheets that cover the past 11 years, the cost of any kind of repair has been low. On the horizon though is a new roof within the next 5 years, new flooring inside due to age, maybe some new windows after 40 years of winter wear. Not only the costs for all of that is more than I want to spend on an older house but it seems that no matter how hard I try to keep up with the requirements of home ownership ... it never ends, as I am always having to do something.

So where's the quandary in that? Whether to sell or keep it with added costs just around the corner.

I've downsized enough the past year to where it would not be too hard to sell or pack what I do not want to travel with. I could keep things I may need in the future if I were to set up a new base camp. After all it's all paid for but is that stuff worth the cost of storage?

As the hounds and I walked through the field tonight, I kept thinking how nice it would be to wake up tomorrow morning with a cup of coffee outside with mountains on the horizon instead of corn and soy bean fields across the highway. I remembered how cold it's going to get this winter and wishing I were in Borrego Springs for a few weeks or months during the snow and ice.

Yes, everything here is good but that feeling deep inside me, to wander, keeps eating at me.